Lynched for dating a white woman

07-Apr-2017 05:25

I wish my male relatives luck and joy in their relationships, but I also feel a pinch when I watch them with their girlfriends.It is the same sharp tug of disappointment that gets me every time I see a black man with a white woman on his arm.These relationships are caring and genuine, and surely bring happiness to the individuals involved in them.I have even dated outside of my racial group, and I married someone who isn't black -- a Native American man (with, I must add, distant French and African ancestry).Most striking to me in recent sociological studies about interracial dating and marriage, is that on every measure, African American women seem to come out at the bottom of the pile.

This is the way things would be if our love lives actually mirrored recent scientific findings, which tell us the human family is so genetically close that we share more than 99 percent of our DNA.Once I overheard my black boyfriend telling his buddies how he preferred white women; on another occasion (with a different black boyfriend) a guy told me he didn't care that I was breaking up with him because he could go out and get a white woman, which was what he really wanted anyway.For both these men (and to be fair, they were not much older than 20 at the time and thus had plenty of maturing to do), white women were the pinnacle of womanhood -- the prize that they secretly coveted, the emotional weapon that they knew they could wield.But this collection of happily ever after stories does not mean that love is blind.

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Romantic attraction is subject to the larger social forces of racial prestige and stigma that swirl all around us, and in this environment, black women are losing out.Despite the steamy scenes on ABC's hit show, (and yes, I am a fan), most single black women are not dating white men (and certainly not hunky white men who hold high government offices and are willing to risk all they have achieved for illicit love).Many single black women are instead finding themselves ignored in today's dating scene.While interracial marriage rates in this country have grown remarkably to 8.4 percent in 2010, Americans still marry within their own racial group the majority of the time.

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