Too shy for online dating
I get too terrified and shut down when a guy I like is around." They may also have more generally negative opinions of themselves, like that they're boring, or that no one will like them because of how quiet and awkward they are, or that they're not very good looking.Before we've had firsthand experience with the dating world women, and men, tend to have a naive, overly romantic view of what relationships and sex are like.Similarly, if a girl is standing around a party and not talking to anyone, people will tend to assume she's unfriendly (unless she has a blatantly shy 'deer in the headlights' look on her face.) I think this view arises from a general belief that women are just more socially competent in general. Just that sometimes the default assumption is that women are naturally more comfortable in social situations, and so if they seem distant or untalkative it's because they're choosing to be that way.Attractive shy women face this bias the most, since people sometimes have trouble conceiving that a physically good looking person could have any problems with their confidence.Naturally they can also be shy about other steps further along in the dating process.They're likely going to feel anxious about those first few kisses, or may be really inhibited, self-conscious, and insecure when they start to fool around with someone.Instead they have to wait and see if she approaches them or seems interested.This naturally leads to a ton of over-analysis and mild obsession as they look for signs that things will work out with the target of their affection.
Since their nerves prevent them from being proactive about solving the problem, they put a lot of stock in the women they come across through their day-to-day lives.
Instead I had to rely on my observations and research on what shy women go through.
Like with men, there's variation in how shy women can be towards the opposite sex and dating.
People may also be projecting their own fears and prejudices onto the behavior of shy good looking women ("She's hot, she'd never like a guy like me.
She's not laughing at my jokes because she's stuck up like all pretty girls", "She'd never want to be friends with me. She's like all those catty popular girls from high school.").They want to talk to a particular guy, but they can't.They want to be able to wittily chat back to someone and make a good impression, but in the moment they just want to escape their nerves, and they do so by clamming up until the guy goes away.If he talks to her she may get totally flustered and tongue-tied, or be so anxious that she ends up babbling on when it's her turn to speak.